bah .

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CHERN.yehlin here
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peeps online.!!

since 1st jan 2009

Sunday, February 24, 2013 9:45 AM

I am busy...
Preoccupied
But whenever I don't post it's a neutral thing.
It means I'm okay!!!
Normal !!
When I'm super upset I have this temptation to post!
But for now I'm okay hahaha

So busy nowadays
March is hellish month
Ballet dance block test
ALL ENDS ON MARCH

But I wanted to post this
That day I FINALLY went dinner with my classmates after so long
And and I got reminded of their good points.

I love Val Ong kindness and consideration for others. And how easy it is to be with her.
I love Andris kindness and compassion
I love Yi Cheen for her jokes and understanding personality
I love Jing yi for her humor and hidden kindness she show to her friends plus her simplistic mind.
I love Daisy for her influence to be hardworking and how much she can click with me at times.
I love Val Khoo for how supportive she is for her friends. She's really 100% for friends and she won't judge friends ever makes me willing to tell her stuffs and she was there for me during breakup episode.

I love Ver for how much we talked and how much we helped each other through our troubles. How much we click and this 'homely' feeling I get when I see her.

I like ken a lot. For how hard he tries to do the best thing for everyone. His sense of responsibility and a lot of his effort for people is done quietly under the radar.

I like yong Xiang for being innocent?. And his efforts.

I like Junhan cause he's so much more mature than I thought

I like yun hsiu cause the card given made me cry and made me believe that I'm not alone and gave me a boost !!

I like George cause everytime me and him joke around and talk rubbish. I feel so free.

And the rest I haven't talked much to them yet.. Not recently

Yeah !! ^^

Wednesday, February 20, 2013 1:35 AM

I hate flashbacks.
Especially when it's about something I've lost.

Today I realised that I rarely tell people my emotions
Perspective yes. Advice.. Yes.
But not what I feel about things. Innermost thoughts and feelings.
Despite knowing that I have friends supporting me.
Waiting for me to tell them things
I don't cry in front of my family. I rarely cry in front of my friends. I have this.. Automatic shield around me.

Now the only person I tell is Vernice.
Last time it used to be Vernice and Lester.

I remember breaking into tears when I told Lester the full story of how my ahgong funeral donations were handled.
I tried my best to continue and made my words clearer despite all the sobs.
He just embraced me and waited for me to finish.
I knew that he wouldn't judge me in anything I said and he would listen with so much patience. so I went on and on and told him everything. Every detail of the story.
Felt so much better after that.

I remember tears streamed down my emotionless face when he told in the face me he went out alone with another girl prior to our date on the same day. That was during the duration of weeks of quarreling and insecurity. I just looked at him and cried.
He begged me not to cry but I didn't have a choice.
That was the first time I cried out LOUD in front of anyone.
I was so sick and tired of everything.
He apologized and waited and waited for me to end. But I think it was only after half and hour I did? After rounds and rounds of tears over every mistake or memory then I choked and eventually stopped.

And now as I sit on my bed. And relive my emotions. I cry again.

Don't get me wrong. I'm happy with my life now. Just this morning I figured that I am happier now than I was in the past.
No longer having someone or some situation dampen my spirits.

It's just... Crying over the past.

Tuesday, February 19, 2013 5:25 PM

I had a revelation
Nowadays I'm very bored studying ..
Like very sian

And I discovered how to make me less sian
Stop doing work so slowly
When I do work quickly the thrill from the speed excites me LOL
Plus I can finish my work faster..!

Why didnt I think of this sooner !!!

9:31 AM

I really want to thank the people who gave me valentines day gifts actually..
Cards
Cause I didn't expect it and I weren't giving anyone ...

Feel so loved even tho I'm out of love LOL

Tuesday, February 12, 2013 10:38 AM

More photos
Below is a post about orientation !!!
^^

10:12 AM

My sleeping hours are getting weirder.
Or at least I'm becoming a more troubled kid.
Cause I'm far too awake for too long

Nevertheless

I wanna be alone now
And post about how much I love life LOL

Orientation was ........
Tiring funny happy and a new experience
It's like I can't believe it's over

I can't believe 20 people trusted me
And I lead them through everything
And it's over heh.

The surprising thing is I think they love me as much as I love them LOL

At the end of the whole orientation experience they gave me this book
And wrote a loooooooooot of sweet stuffs inside
It's like so nice ^^
I read until I cry heh

But now me and nic have to give something back too
HAISH

I tweeted so many things after orientation
A LOT OF POST ORIENTATION BLUES
I tell you hahaha
A lot a lot a lot
You just wanna go back and play

But can't :(

I remember not remembering my meals cause every meal as an ogl was very rushed.
I don't remember what I eat.
It's like you're so busy confirming that your og sits as a og
Sit where?
All got food ?
Uniform?
What time to report back?
Making sure they make small talk.
Making sure they bond

It's like so many things to make sure until you don't really soak in the ambience of the 5 days
While walking teach cheers head count
WHERE TO EVEN WALK
And making sure they do small talk

But I'm glad it turned out well
Haha the book they gave its like a self praise book
Oh yehlin you're so pretty
So nice
Orientation would not be the same without you
Hahahahaha
Read also ego booster

BUT MY OG TURNED OUT UNITED
haha so happy
After so much effort k
They celebrated my friend birthday
WITH A CAKE LOL
I was so surprised too
Haha so zi dong
And they all know each other birthdays

It's like during the war game they went everywhere together
At first is the whole og together
Then they started to gender segregation
I was like
"Walao you all sexist ah?"
Then they laugh laugh and orh orh and went back together
Still had fun hahaha

Og dinners were fun too ^^
And the best part was that
I wasn't the one continuing the conversation
It was the guys and girls
I just stay there and let them talk
I be ogm LOL
Especially the one at marina square
Wa that was really
They talk non stop eh
All the lame jokes
AND SUPER EXCITED AND HAPPY LOL
And yes it was very very fun heh

Then another og dinner I remember
It was at nex roof top
We played Indian poker heh
Very fun too!!!!!
And all the forfeits !!!
Everyone ... Lied to everyone
Nic didn't lie to me LOL
But I lied to him
Heh

My og making og jacket
Like they're planning everything
Which makes me really happy

Another new clique I have would be the Jaser ogls
I remember being awkward feeling tired with them
I remember struggling to make walk in
Cheers
Video with them
I remember being so stressed
Plus we weren't bonded
NO MORE
LOL okay la some a bit
It's like a clique you feel more compelled towards during the orientation
We helped each other so much
And laughed together

And bloody enthu together LOL
Anything goes
Any idea goes

Our dinners at nex and in school
Playing animal farm
Omg you can laugh until you fall onto the floor
Or at least that's what we all did
Laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh

And then at justin house sleepover
We laughed somemore
We didnt even gossip much
Just laughed LOL

When Jaser girl kan Ming won the dance competition part
I was damn happy LOL
Like I was jumping
Like really damn happy
And I remember it was that point that we all started to get really high and crazy.
All the ogls at least
Cheering and cheering

It's like so ... Crazy with them

I miss cheering
I miss all the cheers
Including the other family LOL
The best part was cheering for the other family I guess
Ya like the feeling of everyone cheering together !!

I remember cny period
We all behaved so crazy
Cheer and cheer
Still
And then ran off to chem test
And I totally flunk the test man
Flunking is an understatement
I left blank many pages

After that I cried
Like finally totally cried
Cause everyday I was surviving on 4 hours of sleep
With all the ogls
And all of us were not allowed to make any mistake
To be hyper even after a scolding
And it was over
The whole thing
It's not tears of sadness
It's like crying cause everything is over

I still miss orientation
And I want the Jaser ogls to be together

Even until now I can't believe orientation is over alr.

Heh