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Hiiiiiiii!

CHERN.yehlin here
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since 1st jan 2009
Monday, July 29, 2013 5:30 PM

Does loneliness come with excessive studying ? 
I don't know :( 
Sometimes I do feel lonely.

But I know I have friends no matter what :)



You see.. I don't have time.
I'm working to make a miracle happen.

Friday, July 19, 2013 11:28 PM

So.. 
I'm really not gonna post much anymore !!!!!!! Number one focus is Alevels 
So bye guys !!!
I did pretty badly for mid years :( 

Until As are over :D


Sunday, July 14, 2013 12:38 AM

Bought these. 
Some from online waiting for arrival. 
I am going crazy over the floral ROMPER. 
Secret romper which I bought from bugis
Total cost of everything 
3 dress 2 shorts 2 necklaces 
120 bucks hahaha quite contented :)








Saturday, July 13, 2013 10:48 AM

So..... Hahaha 
Today is gonna be an awesome day. 
Yesterday was a good day. 
The day before was awesome too.
And the day before the before was of course the best cause of 1215! 
But everyday is great.
I'm up in the clouds right now. 
Extreme happiness after MYE over LOL
Which isn't very safe actually 
Okay whatever~ I will start studying k!!!

That day I spent with Val cool for a while once the paper ended 
It was so good. 
So relaxing 
Me and her needed to lepak somewhere until class meet up. 
Since I refused to go home. We went to her house !!!
Wanted to gym to work off all the fats we gained during exam period and holidays.
But NO!!!! Haha
The television was too attractive
We just sat there and watch and watch and watch and watch and laugh and watch 
Omg I even put my leg on her sofa 
Hahaha I hope she don't mind !!! 
And then we watch and we were so late we reached super late hahaha
Much less go to the gym
Get fat only
But I swear it was quality bonding time. 
Like somehow me and her can talk
And talk
And talk 
And talk 
Okay probably cause we have too many things in common. Namely the whole class. 
But it was still so nice 
I miss talking to her. Being with her? 
It's like her outlook on life is very positive !! And she's that type that will keep trying to help you no matter what. 

Haha okay enough of word-shipping her. 

Soo we went for the class BBQ and i will never forget how the class worked together so magically hehe 
Especially .. David. 
You see him vulgar vulgar rude rude
But he's actually one of the most thoughtful or considerate person I know. 
And I don't even know him well but I can see that strength. 
He helped non stop sia. 
Throughout the whole setting up. 
Even when all the guys started to be idiots and play a bit hahaha
He just kept helping until it was done !!
And then even after everything done he kept making sure the BBQ pit was okay. 
Given that the 4 da tian wang was cursing and swearing cause the oil kept splattering on them HAHAHAHA 
The other side the guys was also very nice to the girls too!!! Like will ask you girls want anything ?
As sweet as it is 
I'm like HAHAHAHA the pot is less than 30cm awake you no need ask me if I need anything

And okay I have a fear of BBQ pits cause the oil splatter on me before and ho my gawd it was fucking pain. 
And then sparklers flying on me burnt my skin and a small part of my clothes too. 
Like a 1cm hole LOL 

But the class was so kind 
Like daisy kept taking food for me. 
Val cool too!!!!!
Like I will go and walk around then I see food on my bowl 
And it's all my favorite food 
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww 

Then we had a class conversation 
Haha in so long time leh I swear 
So many things happening in school now the class segregation seemed to go wider. 
But the fact is that it's not like that :)) 
Sometimes when school is so tiring we just forget to take the extra effort to interact. 
Doesn't mean we don't appreciate each other presence ! :) 

Anyway 
The class conversation was really ... HAHAHAHA
I can laugh 
We talked about school
Teachers 
And ... Creepy things 
Turned out the guys in the class were more afraid of stuffs than the girls 
Jiexiang was hiding in a corner alr. 
And we were all like omg how are we gonna go home and take the lift. And shower. And like ... Oh don't talk about it liao 
Plus it was at night 
Under the moonlight
And the neighbors ... 
I didn't see any neighbors. 

LOL

took the last bus home and finally reached home
That crazy ken
He felt bad making his parents drive. 
So 
He WALKED
From jurong east station to jurong west 
A measurement of the distance? 
3 mrt stops and 10minutes bus ride. 

Craaaaaaazy
But for that I respect him
Cause I'm all for dont make parents drive late at night !! 

Next day!!!
I went shopping with my twin for stuffs !!!
:)) 
Brother from another mother 
It was very cool cause I haven't met him in SO LONG 
Then we managed to catch up a lot. 
Understand each other mindset to the point where it's unbelievable. 
I had a lot of fun 
And from there I understood the strength of friendship hehe 
How it's can be better than relationships. 
Unstable relationship that is. 
Walked walked walked 
Had tea break. Talked about a lot !!! 
Love for books etc etc etc 
Can't wait to kope some good books from him after As man

Speaking of which
As in 117 days 

In the past I always told myself no need study very hard cause I might U turn
But when I think about it 
There NO WAY I will U turn 
I am NOT gonna suffer this hell again. 
I'm ready to plunge in and give in my all for the grades. 
So it's really no turning back. 

Plus logically speaking 
With only 4 more months to Alevels 
And 7 months of holiday after Alevels 
Every day I study now will be worth 2 days of play. 
Plus happiness at the end of the day
And pride 
Pretty good trade no? 

Today I'm finally meeting LYNN
Like this girl who's a part of me 
Like if you take her away you can break my heart literally 
My soul sister ? Haha 
Okay la I just miss her a lot cause I haven't met her in ages 
And I can't wait to study at Starbucks 
Cause I miss studying there haha I'm weird 
Love the moments when I'm like fuuuuu this question so hard to do and then I drink a sip of the heavenly drink. 

Plus me and her agree to meet from 12 to after dinner cause of our forever limited time together
And I wanna shop
So badly 
LOL even after I bought 70 bucks worth of stuffs online
I think I'm weird LOL 
But I like being happy 
Like this 

After I've truly let go of the past.
I feel like I've never felt this happy and contented for 3 years. 
The best part is. It's the truth :)

Thursday, July 11, 2013 6:22 PM

Have you ever felt so happy you're looking up smiling to yourself ? For one whole bus ride..
I'm not happy over the fact that I've gained a boyfriend or even went out with a boyfriend or whatever
I'm happy with the fact that I don't have a boyfriend but I'm able to gain so much more happiness than when I EVER had a boyfriend 
With friends like that there's no need to depend on someone for happiness. 
Strong friendship is so much greater than a broken relationship. 
The sense of this happiness being able to last forever makes me so much happier than having a precarious relationship.
I know that there isn't a possibility of me losing my friends.
And this security is able to shield me from whatever harm might come my way in the future.
Until I find a great relationship down the road. 

Today I learnt that the closeness of friendship is so much more than I knew ^^

Ver I go home with you taking your bus when school starts k!!! I will!! 

2:39 AM

Today was so awesome after the paper. 
Okay during the paper I felt like crying.
After the paper I felt like crying.
Then I decided not to talk about my problems anymore !!! 
Hahaha 
Then had quality bonding time with Val cool like super long and we watched movie and tele and commented and I love her cause I know she's kind and she will never judge me. Hehehehe 
Very very relaxing but very fun oh my gosh. 

Then we went class outing
And everyone worked together freak. 
Super super awesome. Had fun cutting preparing all the ingredients with sarcastic comments shot here and there but always laughing and laughing. 
Cooking itself or eating was damn fun too. Hehehe I just miss the times when I feel so comfortable with the class. 
Like I could sit there and feel totally at peace and happy.
I miss being with the class like this so much. 
Felt so bad that I didn't cherish this awesome group of people as much this year..  be it the entire class or the girls. 
Now the people I love are stuck with me for another 5 months and possibly our bonds will last for very very very long. 
How can I not feel contented??

It felt so good to just eat and chat and relax and not think about work or stress or upsetting things. 
For the first time in my life I felt like I had everything possible in the world in the presence of a group of people. 
 in 1215 I have some who are dearer to me. 
Some girls. Some guys. 
And it's because of their kindness shone on me that makes me feel so much more relaxed and happy. 

I guess I really was too depressed or tired or stressed about the whole exam and lacked having fun. 
i forgot about the things we should appreciate in life.
Like a non stop group laughter.
An endless conversation.
Understanding people. 
Sarcastic people. 

Have you ever wanted something so much? And then there is a ton of conditions and troubles and sadness uncertainty that prevent you from getting it? Felt so upset sick of everything I realised that I'm so much better off without it. Around people who love me. And doing things that make me happy.
Feeling genuinely happy every second. 

 I have so many things to be happy bout.
I beleve Someday things will be better 
Just like things are already good.
Plus your future is always up to fate :D

Monday, July 8, 2013 3:30 PM

When someone bares their soul and show their insecurities 
It doesn't have to be a boyfriend or best friend.
You just feel comforted cause you know you aren't alone in this world.
Everybody is trying 
Everyone have their own moments of happiness and sadness. 

It just depends on how much we help each other. 

5:21 AM

Had a 3 hour phone conversation 
LOL 
It was strange or fun. 
Fun yes. 
All I know is everything became better.
I've said everything I wanted to.
Every vulgar LOL
Apologies were made non stop
And didn't say everything I didn't want to. 
Loose end were tied up.
Chapters have closed. 

Somethings just happen. 
But life's like that.
Pick yourself up and carry on.
I am worried about my future.
But I will leave it till next time.

And time for me to really study. 
No more distractions.
First up, studying at home. 
Study for myself. 
Five more months to As 
Yes that's the reality. 
It's coming.

Sunday, July 7, 2013 11:21 PM

So 
I decided to post yet again

If I ever get a boyfriend
These are the people he need to get approval from 

Vernice
Lynn
Jingwen 
Radiance
Siling 
Hazel
Voon 
Val cool 
Andris
Daisy 
Jingyi 
Yi Cheen 
Val Ong 

And these are the guys who will watch my back.

Jon quack
Xavier
Jin Xiang 
Daniel
Jonathan 
Yongxiang
Junwen
Julian 
Xukai 
Joshua
Andrew

All of them are important to me.
All either helped me or I helped them hahaha 
These are the people I hold dear 
And I've talked to them or thought about them a lot. 

A lot of them are helping me out.

I wonder if things will change after As
Will the list get shorter ? 

But as of now
I believe our friendships will last :) 

Maybe when I go uni I will find someone suited for me. Probably~

2:47 PM

My battered soul feels ready to take on life's challenges. 

Don't play with people's feelings.
If you don't like them. Don't overdo things. 

Let my Girlfriends guy friends complete my life. Cause no one can replace them.

2:12 AM

When I look at myself in the mirror
I wanna see 
A pretty girl
A smart girl
A girl her parents are proud of
Someone that helps others
Someone who's successful in her own way
Someone whose conscience is guilt free

I'm working towards that

And after Alevels I'm gonna give myself a makeover 

Helping others give me a great feeling I will never forget. 
To the girl who isn't studying much
I love you a lot and please study for your future cause it's one last exam in a few months time!!!! I really really don't want you to regret. But I really really don't know how to motivate you.

Another friend motivated me
He told me
To study for my parents

Boy. That 5 words was so effective I started straightaway. LOL

3 friends just talked to me at 2.30am while I was feeling down
Two through text.
One through twitter 

Now I feel so much better

This friend told me something which changed a lot of things.
I can't post it here but it's about accepting our past cause it makes us who we are. And what's most important is where do we all wanna go towards our future.
Gosh why am I so blessed.

I have everything.

1:56 AM

I can't sleep.

So much on my mind

On a bright note
I'm changing a lot
Studying a lot more

Which I am very happy about
It's like I'm starting to get used to really studying 
Like idk
I can study for many many hours
Hehe

On the other hand

Sometimes I think that life is really sad

I mean everyone just wanna survive in this world 
Why do we end up hurting one another?
Is it really merely for self preservation ? 
I doubt so. 

Humans are greedy. 
They are selfish 
We are all capable of doing so many things
But we do not.
We don't help each other
We are not sympathetic to others 


And guess what I found out 

Okay it's damn random
But I'm thinking about Lester a lot more lately
Wtf is wrong with me.
Not in the lovey dovey way 
Just wondering what happened.

How do relationships change.
Why can it change so much.
If a guy can lose the feelings towards somebody. 
Wouldn't it mean that they can do it again and again?
When will they stop?
Why are so many guys like that. 

Friday, July 5, 2013 10:29 PM

And it's Junwen Julian ken birthday. 
Lalalalala 

I wish people around me will feel happier. 
Cause right now they're upset.

Where's my self love yehlin? 

Love yourself before you can love others. 

Yes time to be narcissistic :D

10:27 PM

Unhappy. 
I need to dance so badly. 
I wanna dance dance dance dance dance.

Influence is so powerful
How is it that I don't feel like studying cause some of my friends aren't? 
This isn't good
This isn't me.

I'm listening to people around me.
Hearing all their sad stories.
Or their sadness 
Or loneliness
Maybe it's rubbing off me. 
I want a getaway. 
I want to dance. 
I want to watch a movie.

Thursday, July 4, 2013 11:47 PM

Everyday you must 

Eat
Shit 
Sleep 
Smile 
Daydream
Work
Laugh 
Talk to friends
Talk to parents

Especially talk to parents! 
Hahahaha

10:19 PM

Studied with the girls today. Had fun hehehehe 


10:18 PM

On this day one year ago I saw my grandpa lying on a hospital bed. Dead. 
You resisted the illness so much. 
Had emergency call to hospital 2 times but you were safe.
Our first time seeing someone so close to us pass away. 
All of us cried like crazy. 
And we all miss him badly. 
He led an excellent life.
Had a great family 5 filial sons who brought up 9 filial grandchildren.
All of us love him very much.

A director of schools.
Donating so much to help students.
Refusing to engage in any corruptive activities despite the high position you had in Johor Bahru. 
Well respected by ministers and the well known throughout the whole community. 
A great man that we all learnt from.

I miss you gong gong. 
But I know you're well received by the gods up there :) 
Maybe being a Demi god yourself :D
I hope I'm leading a life you're proud of. 
And I hope you will bless us all to be safe and sound.
Eventually we will all join you and be reunited in the skies!! 

With love,
Yehlin your grandchild :)

Wednesday, July 3, 2013 2:52 PM

I missed school!!!! So I'm rather happy now

Tuesday, July 2, 2013 8:24 PM

If you know something but you overprotect your child. Your child will know nothing even with a parent who knows something.

Whereares when you're with a parent who knows nothing and let the child experience something. The child will learn something maybe even more than the parent. 

That's what I learnt anyway. My something. 
Hahahaha

11:33 AM

If I think of myself 
What I want 
I won't let my studies go this awry 

If I think I'm alone
I stop thinking of others
Stop thinking for others
And I have all the strength and potential 
I will pull through 
Somehow.